this is going to be my last entry

my lifes fucked up in so many ways ive lost everything ive actually worked so hard for! and over what! well i am in the wrong i feel so guilty and i wish i could take everything back but thats not how this messed up world works!

ive got so much anger and hatred in me atm. nobody understands me and nobody will! so i decided i will try my best to spill everything out on this shitty site.

on friday i lied to the person i loved the most for sum1 i was really close friends with it was the biggest mistake of my life because i regret it so much. now ive lost that person that actually ment the most to me. Im so so sorry for hurting that person but sorry doesnt mean a thing so i dont know what else to do! i want to just cross the road and get hit by a truck? and DIE coz that would put me out of my missery. everything ive worked so hard for thrown down the drain and i dont  think i can get it back!

FUCK LIFE!! who needs it FUCK EVERYONE! i hate you all! except for that one person i really love and care for! i know you wondering why im saying i care for you when i did such  a horrible thing! sorry doesnt mean a thing but its the only thing i have left, but plead for your forgivenes. i hope you find sumwer in your heart to forgive and forget!

Im at work and everyone is pissing me off! especially my shiity boss the fagget fuck!people on msn MSGing me!!! FUCK OFF im at work and i cant reply coz im busy u fagget's do you want me to get fired or something! fucking losers!

its been 24hrs since jie is gona and im still not managing to stay straight without goin wild and missing her.. cant stop thinking about her!!!

i havent blogged in a while aye.. i guess i been busy.. well anyways last night hien called me up and i really wanted to get out of the house didnt care what we do just wanted to get out of here, get my mind off things. i met hien and joel at campsie we bought a few beers ended up getting trashed over 3 long necks that equeled up 2 9 beers. i really need to stop drinking. this past 2 weeks ive literally been drinking EVERYDAY it doesnt matter if i got trashed or not but atleast have a sip of alcohol =s in the arvo when its nice and hott i literally grave for a class of nice crispy beer.

i wonder when jie is going to call or sms me. she told me im gonna be the 1st to get an sms or a call =D i wonder what shes doin hurry up and email me back atleast!!!

lol me and zac are getting jie to buy us ninja suits from china so when jie comes back we'll be lookn abit like this:

well im out...

Finally finished my newlayout i kinda like it.... spent ages tryna get jie to make me a new header picture... but i ended up finding sumting nice and stuck it on.. WOHOOO!! last night i spent all night tryna figure out how 2 link foto galleries onto my blogg.. once again i  was unsuccessfull.. BLEH!! SOMEONE FREAKIN TEACH ME!!! well 2day ive been doin shiit all started off with a shiit monring i was ment to go to jies house then it started raining and i had no money to get to jies.. mum gave me money yesty but she said she wont give me any today coz it was 4 yesty and 2day... and i spent it all yesty -_- silly me... FUK!...

I WANNA GO TAKING BACK SUNDAY CONCERT!!!!!!

well here i am in 1 piece... u guys are prolly wondering why im saying  "here i am in 1 piece"..

well 2day i got into a car accident but no i wasnt driving i was in the passenger seat luke was driving.. FUCK!!! ive neva been that scared for ages!!!... well lukes car is completely ridden off after a Audi hit it on the rear right side while the audi was goin about 90K's in a 60 zone!! FUKN SLOW DOWN U FAGGET!!... ther wer 3 cars ridden off but ill get to that later...

luke was drivng up the street coming towards marrickville rd at about 2 20pm it was raining road was slippery...  we came to a complete stop looked both ways AND even "I" saw that ther was no cars coming so we made our right turn..then half way in making the turn a Gold Audi zooms down the road goin about 90 FUCKING Killometers outta fucking nowhere appears so luke hits the accelerate to speed up and try to get outa the way then BANG!!! the cunt hit us at full muther fucking speed!!! he didnt break he didnt beep he didnt flash his lights didn do shiit... well the audi hit us on the read left side of the car so the back right side of the door and the back right wheel is completely smashed in all the way!! we spun arnd doing a 360 (well i didnt know until i got out and witness's told us that) because of the impact of the other car hitting us and the back of our car smashed into another car wich was a PARKED CRV!!! i cudnt really remember much coz it all happend in a split second i was shiiting my self wen it happend.. i sat ther trying 2 breathe coz i was badly winded coz of the seatbelts, luke had a sore wrist and a few minor scratches on his arms and chest and the bloke in the audi broke him arm and came out limping... i stayed in the car for about 2 mins coz i was in major shock.. luke was screaming my name i completely ignored him.. he was asking me if i was ok he repeated himself several times untill i reply'd.. he got outa the car but through the back door coz his door was smashed in i looked back into the back seats of the car and it was completely ruind!!

i guess it wasnt my day to die 2day.. and i guess it wasnt lukes either... coz 5 mins before the accidnet i was sitting at the back wer the impact was.. and joel got outa the front seat coz me and him wer fighting 4 it so he jumped into ali's car and i jumped into the front.. so if i stayed at the back i wouldve litrally been dead.. thats fucking scary!! i woudve been mingled up with the rear right door  and if luke hadnt speeded up abit in those few split micro seconds it wuda been his door that caved in........

ambulance toe trucks and firbragade came 5 mins later... cleaned up all the mess.. then cops came 10 mins later -_- (fucking cops... always coming late...) the copper made me give a statement first coz luke was still in shock and crying coz his mum just got to the place wer we had the accident... then luke gave his statement and we wer all done cleaned everything up drove back 2 lukes house with ali and lukes mum.. got back to his house then we started stripping his car taking the system out the air filter the cool air inductor the head lights and the rims till we found out the last rear rim was badly dented..

well heres a diagram on wat happend!! FUCK U THE CUNT THAT WAS DRIVING THE AUDI!!! HOPE THAT ARM NEVER HEALS!!!!

havent blogged for a while been pretty lazy i was ment to this morning cudnt be fuked...

yesterday me luke joel hien reza yen and wawan went ALL the way to richmond!! it was raining we got lost we got ther at about 1.. took us bloody 3 hrs 2 get ther. the whole point of goin ther was to chek out this place called the "MAGNETIC MOUNTAIN".. we arived at the place wawan was sleeping i was sleeping and luke was stired coz reza didnt know wer he was goin the monkey cunt AND it was a big waste of time.. last time a few of my mates went ther they said that the mountain pukk ur car up the hill wen u leave it on nutral.. but ther a spot wer u gotta go and we cudnt fukn find it -_- so yer we did waste our time.. we drove all the way back and on the way back luked just chuked a sudden break coz ther was these two things on the road  freaked me out and shiit... ended up being 2 cows.. HAHA *sigh.. thats how far away we wer from home.. luke got paranoid and shiit coz he thought the cows wer gonna start ramming into his car LOL idiot.. ther cows not bulls -_-.. anyways we drove all the way back on the M4 it was about 3am the M4 was COMPLETELY empty just our car and reza's car.. so we started giving our cars and hit about 190k/h ALL the way pretty fuken scary ... hahah reza was behind us and we missed the exit and reza got out of the exit we wer ment to take so we went out the next exit wich was the chatswood exit and we turned arnd back onto the M4 to get out of the exit we wer ment to go on.. BUT ther was no exit on that side of the road 4 the exit we wer ment to go on and the next exit was AFTER the toll.. and none of us had money *sigh.. so luke being the dumb cunt he already is TURNED ARND on the M4 goin the oppisit FUCKING direction and went out of the exit goin the OPPISIT direction  cunt couldve gotn us killed if a car came.. it was the fukn M4 lucki it was 3 in the morning no cars wats so eva.. we managed to bumo into reza on the road again and then we went home lol...

today i stayed home all day untill my dad called me.. he said my aunty was really sick.. so we went to go visit her.. we picked up luke coz he is close with my cuzn aswell we got ther it was pretty bad.. it was like my aunty was possessed.. my cuzn merry full crying and shiit my dad started reading quran (holy muslim book) started prayin they she wud get betta and stuff... i hope she gets betta soon =[..

and that was my day 2day and yesterday..

jies goin china in 21 days............

no comment............................................................

                               **cough "dogg" cough**

status: chatting
listening to: I miss you - Incubus
mood: missing jie so much =[

i left my house today at about 4pm with plans to go ice skating with jie danii and wawan.. but it didnt happen coz we didnt really plan things out properly -_-... but its ok.. i spent time with jie wich i havent done in a whole coz shes been busy doin her FREAKIN room lol...

 i met jie at eastwood and from ther we trecked it back 2 penno (her area) coz we had nothing else to do 1s we got to eastwood we got fish and chips, well "I" got fish and chips and jie ended up tryna hogg it as usual taking all my chips and shiit.. that was my breakfast lunch and dinner babe =[.. lol its ok i love u =D. all afternoon we wer playing this wierd game that jie came up with about  naming car brands and the person who ran out of car brands lost lol jie lost all rounds =].. in her blogg it sez that she won but shes lying. then we moved on to other things like alci labels, i won that one ofcourse then we moved on to companies and shiit i won that... lets just say i won all of the rounds hahahaha =]... jie bumped into her primrary skool friends... jies ex best friend from primrary is wierd she came up 2 jie started telling her she loves jie and shiit.. and like they havent really spoken since primrary??.. hahah and she asked if she could rub my hair =s why does every1 love to rub my hair.. I hafta worn everybody my hair is BADLUCK!!! pwahahah.. even qyuinie the wierdo rubed my hair 2day coz i bumped into her on the train and thats the 1st thing she said "can i rub ur hair" she sez it feels like rabbit furr?? lol wierdo..

after i was done with jie i went to meet all the boiz at stratty to have cofee... i was waiting alone for about 10 mins till i saw tommy and james wang walking around.. and i went with them to 5dock to eat after that they dropped me at stratty again wer i had to meet all the boiz (hien, joel, reza, zac tuan, bayrem, ali, david, khong and pasquali) we had cofee and then we wer ment to go for a cruiz but i wanted to go home so tuan dropped me home... well that was my day.. mostly spent it with my princess =].. 

here i am again.. another day another FUCKING blog =s... well its about 1:38pm (eastern mobile time =P) just got out of the shower bout to shave my head...

well today im gonna meet Jie, Danii, Wawan, Joel & anika... but i have no idea wat time. It all depends on wat time Jie comes home from her grandperants place i guess.. i have no idea wat wer gonna do.. well we wer ment to go ice skating but i told em nah coz i cant afford it, its freakin 20 buks P/p and im not that rich these days... Geeze i must look like a mad pov cunt...

i was ment to meet zac and joel earlier 2day at about 10 till zac got lazy.. i called his house at about 10am he was still sleeping  i asked him if we wer still gonna go auctions today his like come over at 230 -_-... im like dw about it u lazy cunt, its 2 late.. so thats like the 3rd time we cancelled on goin to the auction's coz of zacs sleeping pattern... he litrally goes to sleep at 6am everynight.. fucking msn junky....

IBZ LOVES JIE

its 1 45 im sitting here with my nut hanging out coz i got a hole in my boxers... its pretty comfortable... just walking arnd my room with my nut hanging outa my boxers..

jies sleeping she fell asleep again like she does every night... im talking to zac and danii. danii is goin crazy and shiit coz wawan fell asleep and she wudnt hang up the fone. shes acting like a freaky stalker. doesnt wanna hang up, she wants to stay on the fone and listen to him breath HAHAHA then shes gonna tuck the fone in her bed and kiss it goodnight pretend that wawan is ther HAHAHA pretty funni stuff. then the next morning she wakes up turns arnd and looks at the fone and picks it up and sez goodmorning.. AND HIS NOT THER HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA =D..

wat did i do 2day??... well my dad woke me up at 20 had 2 go 2 the mosque coz he started goin on about me neva goin coz i havent been 4 almost half a yr and im losing faith and shiit =s.. so i went ther then i met zac and joel at zacs house we chilled ther 4 abit lokon at houses 2 lease over the internet then tommy and james wang came over 2 say hi then khang and ghefo also came over 2 say hi... then it was me zac and joel again.... we walked down 2 newtown 2 look at furniture and shiit got a bite 2 eat then we trecked it down 2 st peters to look at this house... mi goodnes... the house was pretty fucking hott... 3 stoy house 520 buks a week... 3 bedroom.. 1 bedroom eahc floor... master bedroom has ONE WHOLE floor wich is the top floor to itself.. walk in wadrobe onsweet and shiit... pretty crazy... but its abit way over our budget... wer thinking sumting like 450 max a week so yer... then we trecked it back to zacs house this was about 9 30 got free food from the thai restaurant... had dinner then i went home... and that was my day =]

fuck my balls are getting cold im tucking em back in